No Katniss

NOTE: This is not Heather…wait, wait, wait - don’t run off so quickly.  If you have followed Heather’s blogs long enough to read this disclaimer, then you have also learned that she is a particularly curious flavor of crazy, and like watching a train wreck, you can’t help but to keep reading.  In that case, this entry is for you.  Rubberneck no longer, my friends.  Below you will find some of the juicier bits about Heather, which she may be unwilling to share, but I, as her groom-to-be, are both qualified and willing to divulge.  Enjoy.

I could make the list very long, so let me whet your appetite with a few teasers before we get to the main course.

1.     Reminiscent of her awkward phase (ask her dad to see “The Wall”), Heather still wears metal mouth gear at night, the likes of which haunt most middle schoolers’ dreams.  I can’t wait to wake up to that every morning.  Rawr.

2.       Like any woodland creature, Heather marks her den in easily identifiable ways: simply look for the piles of Kleenexes.  For our nature lovers hoping to spot the ever illusive H. Sapiens MacDonald, Heather, look for the tell-tale, fluffy piles of tissue amassed near (but not usually on) bedside tables, under pillows (saving them for later), and especially that little crack between the passenger seat and the door in my car.  In an attempt to remain PC, some may call it “nest packing.”  I fondly refer to them as her “tissue graveyards.”

3.       Until recently, our closet resembled what could most accurately be described as a “scarf nest.” Her cat Casper loved to lay in the middle, which made my getting dressed in the morning all the more inconvenient for both he and I.

Well, my salivating readers, are you ready for the big fish?  I’ll keep you waiting no longer!

4.       Heather is no Katniss.

Perhaps that last tidbit didn’t quite register.  If not, take a few minutes to read through Heather’s previous entry entitled The Peeta Potential, then keep reading here.

Whereas Heather would liken her role in our relationship to that of Katniss Everdeen , “a terrible person in all regards who is out to survive and protect her own interests,” I think a better comparison would be to Eowyn, heroine from the Lord of the Rings, shieldmaiden of Rohan, sister of Eomer, and niece of King Theoden.  Eowyn’s renown was won not by her beauty (though she was exceedingly beautiful)...

Eowyn looking fine

...not by her title (though she was born of Rohan royalty, became Rohan’s Queen, and married Gondor nobility), nor by good luck or good choice (she often found herself between a rock and a hard place, crying big, ugly tears).

Big, ugly tears

Instead, her renown was won by her love for her people that lead her to place herself in harm’s way time and time again. 

Taking care of witch kings like a boss

Heather’s character is established in a similar fashion.

Recently, I fell ill (I almost died).  I was planning on toughing it out on my own (my outlook on survival wasn’t good), because I didn’t want to be a burden (I was a baby in every regard) or make Heather stay home from work to care for me (I desperately hoped she would use a sick day to come over).  However, without my request (big, mournful eyes don’t count as an official request) and at risk to her own health, Heather volunteered to care for me. 

Heather taking one for the team

This example of selflessness and nurturing is not an isolated incident.  Time and time again, Heather lays aside her own interests to see to the needs of her friends and family.  Many of us can recall sometime in our lives when we needed help and Heather was there.  However, her loyalty and compassion go far beyond elevating my needs above her own.  She has been caught on several occasions building up my name to those who have never met me and fiercely defending my honor when it is called into question.  Walking into a room of strangers who already hold you in high regard because of the way someone else talks about you will make any man feel like a million bucks.

We are all are own biggest critics, so it is no surprise that Heather’s self-portrait is not the most flattering. However, her readers deserve to know the whole story – that Heather MacDonald loves fiercely, perseveres quietly, and serves selflessly.  Perhaps this is why she and I are such a good fit: although both of us seem to have a somewhat self-deprecating view of ourselves, we clearly see the good in each other.  We have made it our personal goals to build each other up and boast to the world about the other. 

So loyal readers, you are 100% correct: Heather MacDonald is a particularly curious flavor of crazy, but she's my crazy. Always.

-Josh